Until debt do us part

author aoife gaffney until debt do us partIn my latest co-authored book, WE Summit Together, for the first time I talk openly about how I ended up in debt – twice – because of my inability to talk about money with my partner.  I also talk about how I managed to get out of it.

I clearly had to make the same mistake more than once before I learned how NOT to do something.

Sometimes I win and sometimes I lose LEARN.

The biggest lessons for me were

  • learning to talk openly about money,
  • learning to ask for help,
  • learning to listen,
  • learning to figure out what I wanted by figuring out what I did NOT want
  • and learning how to take inspired action.

I learned to face my FEAR.

Fear is simply Focus + Effort + Action = Results.

I married my soul mate recently.  Old fears and anxieties crept up again; how do I talk about money, how do I ask for something, what if we have different views about debt, how do we discuss bills and savings goals and so on.  It has been over 20 years since I have had a “money conversation” with anyone other than myself.

I took a breath, opened my bank statement and said: “do you have 5 minutes, I’d like to run through something with you”.  The world did not end, the sky did not fall in, there was no stress, drama or anxiety.  All of the stresses were in my head.

Since that moment, we have been able to have open, honest and really speedy conversations about money in the same breath as I’d say “pass the salt”.  We have set joint savings and income goals but we each still have our own independence and freedom.  We don’t always agree all of the time but we have both made a commitment to figure stuff out together, and we live in a very small house so there is nowhere to hide.

You can read more about the strategies I used to get out of debt and change my mind mindset in WE Summit Together.  It is an incredible book written by incredible women and ALL the proceeds go to The Christina Noble Foundation.


4 feet of snow

Coping with cabin fever

I’m about to go quite mad! Cabin fever is setting in.

However, thank heavens for my Kindle.

90% of my books are still in boxes. I packed up my old house in August 2017, moved to my new house, unpacked in September 2017 and then repacked in January 2018 for renovations.

I love free stuff. My books are free from today until Monday on Amazon Kindle

I also get lots of free books from BookBub. I get a daily email with offers.

I can’t do some of the things I love doing do such as tidy my sock drawer (no drawer and socks in boxes), clean the kitchen (I haven’t got a kitchen), vacuum the carpet (floors are bare concrete), read a physical book (I’d have to find it), cook (no kitchen remember).

I sold my television about a year ago and I have not missed it until the last few days. Then again, I haven’t got a sofa or chair to sit on either. Arghhh

However, there is always my trusted Kindle and free books.

I have signed up for 30 day free trials for Amazon Audible and Prime Video.

That should keep me going until I can physically make outside my front door.


freedom word cloud

Give yourself permission to be free

Today is a snow day!

I give myself permission to take the day off.

I give myself permission to work on my business and not in my business.

I give myself permission to do whatever I want.

The majority of my work is location independent.  This means that I can do what I love as long as I have an internet connection and my laptop.

This allows me the freedom to be where I want to be and to be there for my family when they need me.

A book that changed how I perceive traditional work is [amazon_link asins=’B003O86L0I’ template=’ProductLink’ store=’conyouownba0a-21′ marketplace=’UK’ link_id=’9195a0af-1c6f-11e8-8488-7b21442835d1′]

Have a great day, stay safe, stay warm.